The Unexpected Members
by Samhoku
Summary: This is a self insert with myself and my sister. I am doing my level best to keep from having us become the dreaded Mary Sue's. I have permission to use my sister in this fanfiction. Rated T for safety, their are rules for reviews inside, please read them before reviewing. Samantha and Veronica meet Balin in the woods and join the company as two very unexpected Members.
1. Chapter 1

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Samantha and her sister, Veronica, where walking to their church that Sunday. Both Brunettes where being very happy and themselves when suddenly their where woods around them, what seemed like randomly.

"Is it just me or are we in the woods? And when did this happen?" Veronica asked, her brown eyes flicking around and catching their scenery quickly.

Samantha paused and her blue eyes looked around, "Um, I dunno. I tend to have memory lapses so, technically this could have happened at any moment."

Veronica looked scared for a moment then she smiled brightly, "Uh, okay! Like your parents tell you when you are lost, you sit down and do nothing!" She plopped herself down on the ground and then looked up at her sister, "Aren't you going to sit down?"

Samantha looked down at her skirt and grumbled, "I would love to, but due to this stupid skirt I cannot." Then she looked thoughtful and sat down anyways, "Whatever."

Veronica fake whistled because she couldn't. Samantha became irritated and covered her ears, looking very irritated indeed. Samantha grumbled to herself, glaring into outer-space. Her expression matched her clothes, dark.

Balin came over and looked down at the two girls, he was on his way to Bilbo's house, "Oh, hello. Balin, at your service." He bowed with his arms out to his sides then he stood the right way again.

Veronica scrambled up and bowed back, replying, "To yours and your families." She smiled, "I am Veronica, this is my sister, Samantha. Forgive her grumpiness, she doesn't enjoy being lost in the woods."

Balin chuckled and looked at Samantha, tilting his head slightly, "How old are you, young ladies?"

Veronica pointed at herself with a smile, "I am twenty, my sister is nineteen." She pulled Samantha to her feet and said, "Before you ask, no, we are not twins. My sister is heavier then me, she has glasses, and she has blue eyes."

Samantha looked indigent, "I lost weight! I lost ten pounds!" She crossed her arms over her chest and looked at her feet, "Jerk face."

Veronica ignored her sister, "Are we in Middle Earth?" She tilted her head at Balin with curiosity and said easily, "I am looking for Bilbo. We heard that Gandalf was meeting him with a company of dwarves."

Samantha looked at her older sister in amazement then looked back at Balin. Balin nodded and said, "Yes, that is where I am going now. Would you both like to accompany me?"

Veronica nodded and smiled, "Sure!" She looked at her sister, "Will Sammie be able to wear her skirt around like this or will we need to stop and get her clothes that she can move around in better?"

Balin studied the young lady with curiosity, "Hurm, Yes. We will stop in the town before Hobbiton and get her better clothes. Why don't you both have beards?"

Veronica said with a deadpan expression, "Thats because we are not dwarves. We are humans, even if we are shorter then most."

Balin nodded once, satisfied with that and he walked in front of them, going towards the town before Hobbiton, "That makes sense, come, we must not be late."

Samantha grumbled to herself, cursing herself for trusting Balin. But he seemed like a nice enough dwarf, and from what she remembered from the movies, he would always be nice. Samantha had to think back in the books, how many of the dwarves ended up going insane?


	2. Chapter 2

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Once they got the town Samantha was dressed in practical trousers and Tunic. Samantha grinned at her sister, "Now I look like a demented rotten pumpkin." She looked at Balin who seemed to be holding in laughter. He had been enjoying these ladies company, they where very odd.

They traveled to Bilbo's house then Balin knocked on the door. The hobbit came and threw opened the door, obviously irritated. Balin bowed, "Balin, at your service."

Bilbo looked stunned, "Good evening." He then looked at the girls with a bewildered expression, "And to you, ladies."

Veronica bowed with flourish, "Veronica, at your service." She instantly tried to fit in with the dwarves, Samantha didn't even try. Well, she did try, but it was a very poor attempt.

Samantha bowed awkwardly, "Samantha, not at your service. My title is 'Lost in the woods.'"

Balin sighed and looked at the girl with glasses, he noticed they where dirty and gently took them from her, cleaning them on his tunic as he walked in. He saw his brother and handed them back to Samantha, going through the normal thing.

Samantha grumbled as she placed them back on her face, "I am gonna end up liking him and I can't even remember if he dies."

Bilbo looked worried, "Pardon me?" He looked up at the girl and was surprised when a bright smile crossed Samantha's face.

"Nothing, old chap." Samantha gave the hobbit a hug around the shoulders then followed Balin, sticking to him like glue. She trusted this dwarf and didn't want him to be very far from her.

Veronica felt bad for the hobbit and ran around with him, trying to replace things and cook food for the two dwarves. When she heard a knock on the door she yelled to Bilbo, "Its the door!"

Bilbo ran up to the door and opened it, he stopped short when he saw Fili and Kili.

"Fili"

"Kili"

"At your service." They both said with goofy grins on their faces. Fili's was a bit more calm while Kili seemed like he could go insane at any moment.

Fili and Kili came in, uninvited. Samantha saw Kili rubbing his boot on Bilbo's mothers jewelry chest and she walked over, tapping the unsuspecting dwarf on the shoulder, "Excuse me, but I don't think Mr. Bilbo likes it when you do that."

Kili looked slightly amused at the short girl's assessment, "Oh, you think not? Where do you come from, little one?"

Samantha looked very irritated, "I am not a child and I am not much smaller then you, Ijit. I am Samantha Lost in the woods." She pushed Kili's boot off the jewelry chest, "Keep all mud either on the welcome mat or on your boots, or I am afraid you will have a premature death."

When the next dwarves fell in the door, Samantha and Bilbo both stared at them then at Gandalf. Gandalf looked at Samantha and amusement shown in his eyes, "Oh, good. You got here safely."

Samantha looked confused, but for some odd reason the idea of Gandalf bringing them here did not surprise her. She grumbled and walked away, "Thirteen people to feed plus two equals fifteen."

Then suddenly she said in a cheerful voice in the other room, "Next comes Mr. Stick Up His Butt."

Veronica heard and face palmed, she muttered, "Help me, my sister is going to get killed by Thorin."


	3. Chapter 3

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Samantha had forgotten about how they threw the dishes around. Samantha had fled and was now hiding in the closet, hoping that none of the dishes broke. She gingerly came out just as Thorin knocked on the door. Gandalf looked at her then opened the door, the look said volumes. Mainly about how she wasn't to disrespect Mr. Stick Up His Butt.

Thorin came in and then insulted Bilbo. Samantha grumbled something to herself, it was unintelligible except to those nearby, and it had something to do with stuffing a stick up his rear, only she used a much more colorful word for rear.

Fili and Kili both struggled to keep in laughter, as they where the closest to the girl. They both decided they liked her when she scolded them for tormenting Bilbo, much to her dismay. Samantha shot them a look and shuffled closer to Balin like a senile old women.

Thorin shot a look at his sister-sons and then he sat down at the table, speaking with Gandalf. When they all made comments about Bilbo not being a burglar Veronica started to agree, knowing that this was the way the movie went, however their where a few more comments.

Gandalf stood up and made himself look bigger and scarier. Samantha shrunk and hid behind Balin, thinking that the nice white haired dwarf would protect her. That was probably a foolish notion.

"A Burglar he shall be!" Gandalf finished with, Veronica and Samantha had tuned out and fled the scene as if Gandalf would grow claws and attack them.

Fili and Kili and Balin looked in the direction of the girls with concern, they heard them both giggling nervously. Balin shook his head as he heard Samantha say in a panicked high pitch voice, "We are gonna die!"

Gandalf looked back towards where the girls were, "You can come out now." He tried not to smile as both girls slunk into the room with sheepish smiles on their faces.

Bilbo took the document and started reading it, as he read it when he said Incineration, Samantha started to have the same reaction as Bilbo, only without the fainting attached to it.

* * *

(**A/N: I am time skipping due to my very real memory lapses, xD)**

When Bilbo woke up the only person at the house with him was Samantha. He looked at the girl and asked with loneliness etched in his voice, "Where are they?"

Samantha felt bad for the hobbit, she knew what loneliness was like, "They went on the adventure. I wanted to stay behind with you."

Bilbo looked at the document and signed it with a smile, he looked at Samantha then had her sign it as well. They both headed out the door, although, due to Samantha being a demented pumpkin she couldn't run as fast.

Once Bilbo got to the horses he handed to document to Balin. Balin looked it over with his glasses thingy and then asked, "And where is Samantha?"

Bilbo smiled cheerfully, "She should be here any minute!" When about ten minutes had passed Bilbo said with concern, "She was right behind me."

"She huffs, puffs, weezes, and practically dies when she is running." Veronica commented dryly.

Samantha came in the midst of the horses doing precisely what her sister said, but she also collapsed on the ground and muttered something unintelligible into the ground.

Balin chuckled, tugging on his beard, "Well, you are both here."

Thorin ordered gruffly, "Get them ponies." He was shocked when Samantha grumbled a comment she thought only she could hear as she climbed up on the horse.

"Yes Sir Stick up the butt, I will do whatever your highness wants for you are the king of sticks up the butt." She hauled herself up unto the horse and suddenly realized that Fili and Kili where laughing crazily while everyone else was deathly quiet, "Um..."

"So, I have a stick up my butt?" Thorin said with a glare at Samantha.

Samantha's eyes zoned out then she smiled, "Nope, not anymore, it seems to have fallen out."

Thorin got a very dark look on his face and said, "She is bait."


	4. Chapter 4

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Samantha didn't like the idea of being bait, so she stayed as far away from Thorin as she could. Once she was far enough way she heard Bilbo and Veronica singing a very morbid song.

_"I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee won't my mommy be so proud of me! I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee, ouch, it stung me! I'm squishing up a baby bumblebee won't my mommy be so proud of me, ew its yucky. I'm cleaning up a baby bumblebee, won't my mommy be so proud of me, I'm cleaning up a baby bumblebee, now my mommy won't be mad at me!"_

Samantha wrinkled her nose, thinking about the morbidness of this song. Poor bumblebee, it was doomed to die. The minute it was picked up by the demented child.

Balin shook his head with a smile, "Bilbo and Veronica seem to have created a special bond, while the twins seem to want to be around you. Why don't you trust them?"

Samantha looked thoughtful, "I don't trust easily, and they are annoying. I like you, you are nice and don't torment me mercilessly."

Balin nodded then he made sure his horse kept going, thinking about what Samantha had said. This made sense, she trusted people older then her. Not so much people close to her own age, it seemed, besides her sister.

When they had stopped for a rest Samantha looked around the place where the farmer used to live. She had agreed with Gandalf right off the bat, they should keep moving. No use risking death when death could be avoided.

However, King Stick Up the Butt seemed to be contrary, as usual. Samantha wrinkled her nose and sat down by the twins, deciding it may be safer to sit by them at the moment. They where more likely to protect her at this point then Balin or Gandalf.

Veronica asked Thorin with a long suffering voice, "Why don't we just listen to Gandalf? Did it ever occur to you that he may know better then you?"

Thorin ignored Veronica and continued arguing with Gandalf. When Gandalf abandoned ship she went and stood by Bilbo, saying to her new friend, "Its alright, Gandalf will come back."

* * *

When the wolves howled Bilbo came over and he stood by Veronica, trembling at the same pace she was, "What is that?" The hobbit and Veronica asked at the same time.

"Orcs."

"They raid at night. Never a sound, just lots of blood."

Samantha looked at Kili with a irritated expression, she kicked at him sense she was sitting by Fili. She found the quieter dwarf better company, "Don't make my sister more OCD then she already is."

Kili looked confused, "What is OCD?" He looked at Veronica when she started to explain.

Veronica was using her hands a lot, they where fluttering around without herself realizing it, "OCD is a mental disorder that makes you obsessively compulsively think or do something."

Kili nodded once, understanding that. He flinched when his uncle said harshly, "You think Orc raids are funny?"

Kili said in a soft voice, "I meant nothing by it." He looked at the ground. Samantha felt bad for the normally happy dwarf and she took his head in a odd hug, causing Kili to smile and squirm away to escape.

"Of course not, you know nothing of the world." Thorin said sharply as he walked away.

Kili looked sad again and Samantha said in a quiet voice so only the twins could hear, "I think the stick is up his rear again."

Kili covered his mouth and pretended to be stroking an imaginary beard. He held in a laugh while Fili got a wide grin across his face. Balin saw Fili and Kili struggling with their composure and came over, telling them all the tragic story of why Thorin was so depressed and angry.

Samantha summed the dwarf king up, "So the elves wronged him, an Orc killed someone he loved, therefore he is bitter and angry at the world, and because of that he feels the need to lash out at people."

Balin thought about this then nodded, "Yes, thats pretty much it."


	5. Chapter 5

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Samantha was on guard with Fili and Kili with the horses. She stayed as far away from them as possible, counting the horses every ten minutes when Kili sneaked up on her, "Samantha."

Samantha jumped and spun around, punching him in the nose. Kili fell away from her holding his nose and Samantha shook her hand, muttering about his nose being like a Javelin.

Kili touched his nose tenderly, making sure it wasn't broken, "Dang, you hit harder then I would've thought. I was just going to tell you that we are missing a couple of ponies." He saw that she had concern and attention about the ponies, "No, I didn't break my nose, even if you weren't going to ask."

Samantha gave him a fanged grin, "One does not simply sneak up on Samantha and not have a bruise to speak of." She looked at the ponies and counted them herself, "Where did they go?" She looked worried, "What will Thorin think? He will kill all three of us!"

Fili brought Bilbo over, explaining the situation to him. Bilbo looked as concerned as Samantha, but he became sidetracked with Kili's nose, "What happened to you?"

Kili growled, "Samantha punched me in the nose." He obviously didn't want to talk about it, which amused Samantha to no end.

Bilbo ran off and Kili went to go get help, leaving Fili and Samantha.

Fili started cracking up as he remembered his brother's face when she punched him, "You must've hit him pretty hard."

Samantha huffed and said with irritation, "If he didn't sneak up on me I wouldn't react violently."

Soon they gave Samantha a weapon, it was a bow and arrow. She looked very pleased as she messed around with it for a few moments. Once she had it figured out they all started sneaking towards where Bilbo had been gone. Veronica looked like a nervous rabbit with her daggers and small sword. Once they attacked the Goblins Veronica went right to Bilbo to help him with the horses escape.

Samantha was the second person caught along with Bilbo. She said cheerfully, "Just let me die, it would be much nicer."

Thorin threw down his weapon, his glaring eyes on Bilbo. Samantha was glad she wasn't the object of his wrath, but it annoyed her that he would be wrathful against someone that much smaller then her.

* * *

Samantha and Veronica where inbetween Kili and Fili in their sacks. Samantha said cheerfully, "Well, hopefully we will be dead before they decide to eat us."

Fili said quietly, "I think you are hoping for a little too much." He looked at the stupid Troll's with annoyance.

Bilbo and Veronica both got an idea. Bilbo jumped up and started talking to them about how to eat dwarves with Veronica shouting out ideas. Next was the worms. Samantha and Thorin figured it out first, Thorin kicked Kili and Samantha glared at Balin until they understood. Once they did they all started shouting out about how big their worms where.

Samantha shouted, "Mine will be laying eggs in my body soon!" She suddenly felt ill at the idea and started to puke.

Kili and Fili both made a face and tried to get away from Samantha. Fili said with annoyance, "If you can't say things without making yourself puke, then please don't speak at all!"

"The Dawn Take you!"

"Who is that?"

"I dunno."

"Can we eat him too?"


	6. Chapter 6

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing.**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

**Guest Reviewer: Thank you for your review, its appreciated. I am writing this purely from memory of the books and movies. Sadly sense my memory is spotty I am trying my best to keep myself and my sister from becoming Mary Sues and keep the characters in character. Please read all the chapters before you review next time.**

Chapter:

Thorin growled some comments at Bilbo and Veronica stuck her small frame between Bilbo and Thorin, jutting her chin out and her eyes flashing sparks of fire, "Back off. He is smaller then you and he saved your sorry hide. Stop being so full of yourself and stop and think about what you are saying before you say it." Veronica turned and gently ushered the hobbit away, "Its okay Bilbo."

As they walked they heard Radagast come and Samantha had her bow out and the wizard stopped and his eyes crossed to see the arrow better. Samantha shivered and her eyes where wide before she put the bow down, "I almost put it arrow in you!" She shivered again then went to stand by Balin.

Fili and Kili kept a good distance away Samantha, seeing that she seemed on edge. Radagast went into his trace and Samantha did the loopy sign. Balin gave her a severe look and she gave him an innocent smile.

Once Radagast snapped out of it he handed Gandalf something, Samantha vaugly remembered this part of the movie and became half way excited. Then she became worried...this meant they would be chased by Wargs...This would test endurance and speed.

Veronica seemed to think the same thing because she walked over to her sister and seemed to be mentally preparing herself to run. Gandalf looked at the girls and raised an eye suspicious of what they were doing.

They heard the wargs and Samantha jumped, hiding behind her sister again. Thorin gave her a glare and mouthed, 'Bait.' Samantha ran and hid behind Gandalf after that and said, "Thorin wants to use me as bait!"

Fili and Kili where amused to no end by this, as she seemed to be acting more childish then anything. But Kili wasn't one to talk, so he didn't speak his thoughts, knowing he would receive a zinger from Veronica or Samantha. Or possibly even his own brother, one could never tell.

Radagast ran off and distracted the wargs from them. Once he was gone Gandalf led the way through the stony area and Samantha was in the back with Bilbo. Samantha ran behind the hobbit, making sure that he stayed ahead of her. Her sister was ahead of her behind the brother's, so she wasn't worried about her.

They all hid behind the rock and they all where trying to be very quiet. Samantha, in order to quiet her breathing, covered her own mouth. When it was up there she noticed the look that went between Kili and Thorin. Kili jumped out and shot at the Warg and then when it started to come down Samantha shot it in the throat, cutting off its air.

Veronica jumped on the Orc and slit its throat seconds after it screamed then she jumped off and covered her ears. Fili cut off its head then they all started running again, only this time the whole Warg army was after them.


	7. Chapter 7

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing. By Rude I mean...not offering any suggestions on how to make the story better and just flaming.  
**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Guest** Reviewer:Heatblizzard**:** Thank you for your review. I am just trying to keep people from flaming me, as I have had it happen with self inserts before.**

Chapter:

Gandalf jumped behind the rock and everyone followed suit. Thorin yelled at the dwarf brothers to get down their and they quickly complied. They noticed that they couldn't find Samantha until she jumped in on top of them, she did a summersult and landed on her feet. She had her arms out to keep her balance then she threw her hands up in the air, "Ta da! I hope you all caught that because that will only happen once!"

Veronica rolled her eyes and said, "You crushed Thorin." She nudged the regal dwarf with her foot and Thorin tried to stick his sword in her foot. Veronica walked away and then looked down the tunnel, "Gandalf, where are we?"

Gandalf said with a smile, "Just follow the tunnel." He counted everyone as they walked past, looking at Samantha and said, "Time here isn't the same as at home. Think Narnia."

That comment made Samantha pause and she looked at the wizard with curiosity, "How do you know about Narnia?"

Gandalf tapped the side of his nose and winked at her, "Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards." He ushered her ahead of him and chuckled to himself, knowing that this would bother her for quite some time.

* * *

Veronica and Bilbo where so happy to see Rivendell. Once they where in the square they were surrounded by elves. Samantha couldn't remember how this turned out so she had threaded her bow along with Kili and they both stood at ready.

When the elves stopped even Samantha thought that they offered insult. Gandalf said with amusement, "No, they are offering you food."

Samantha looked happy all the sudden and said to the elf, "You are now my best friend." She looked at her sister who seemed to be speaking with the dwarves. Once they came to a decision they all walked to where they would eat.

Samantha looked at her green food but ate it happily. After all, it was food. Food is food is food in Samantha's eyes. She looked at Ori after swallowing, "Its good."

Kili gave her a funny look, "How can you eat Rabbit food?" He picked at his own salad.

Samantha gave him a funny grin, "Because its good food. If Rabbits eat it and you eat them, then surly we can eat the rabbit food." She resumed eating, ignoring Kili and Fili.

Veronica and Bilbo where both listening to lord Elrond list what the swords had done. Bilbo seemed surprised that his sword would have been either a letter opener or a small dagger.

Veronica patted her friend on the shoulder and smiled at him, "You name him, he will do great deeds, I am sure of it."


	8. Chapter 8

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing. By Rude I mean...not offering any suggestions on how to make the story better and just flaming.  
**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

My Reviews: I am very sorry, I have not been on lately, my sister is in Alaska.**  
**

Chapter:

Samantha was sleeping soundly when Kili nudged her shoulder gently, then he shook it a little harder. All the dwarves stared in amazement as Samantha slept on. Veronica stood at Samantha's feet and cleared her throat before launching into song, "Wake up, good morning, celebrate the sun is shining, wake up your body!" Samantha interrupted her and growled, getting up, "Whaddya want?!"

Fili covered Samantha's mouth then hissed, "We are leaving before Elrond can stop us." He bit his lip to keep from yowling when Samantha bit his hand. Fili pulled his hand away and studied the teeth marks, "You left some pretty impressive marks."

Samantha gave him a fanged smile, "Thank you, I pride myself in my teeth marks." She stood up then grumbled as she walked in the direction they would be leaving in, "I suppose Mr. Grumpy Pants will be leading us."

Veronica muttered, "He is less grumpy then you are." She followed Samantha as they all started to leave. Samantha had already guessed with common sense where Gandalf was. Being a distraction.

Thorin was still muttering to himself about making Samantha bait, he really wasn't impressed with the stick up the butt thing. In fact, he really hated it.

Veronica walked with Thorin and was obviously trying to calm him down, "Listen, she is my sister. She may be grumpy sometimes, but she doesn't mean anything by it."

Thorin ignored Veronica, he would calm down eventually, but the girl was getting on his nerves. Samantha, not Veronica. Veronica could be tolerated, Samantha annoyed him to no end.

Bilbo was nervous about Thorin's irritation, so he made sure to stay close to Veronica.

Kili and Fili made sure to hide Samantha by walking in front of her. Neither wanted Samantha to become bait. As they climbed on the mountain their where storms.

This seemed oddly like Samantha had seen this before. She looked around suspiciously and was drenched with rain. She was in no way, shape, or form, in a good mood. Suddenly the rocks started to split and Samantha launched herself backwards, blocking Veronica from going over the edge.

Veronica screamed and covered her eyes, starting to rock back and forth. Her fear of heights finally overcame her. Samantha heard Kili cry out for his brother and then Samantha looked up just as Thorin did. Thorin yelled, "Rock Giants!"

Samantha gripped to the rock and used one arm to keep her sister against it as well. She closed her eyes and said a silent prayer as the rock game went on. When the rock giant slammed into the rocks, Samantha and Thorin instantly went to see if Fili and Kili where okay.

Veronica took tiny steps towards that area, her squinting as she walked, obviously terrified. She looked down and saw Bilbo, "Bilbo!"

Thorin heard and went to go rescue the Hobbit. Once the hobbit was up Veronica knelt and gave Bilbo a hug, "Oh, I was so scared, Mr. Bilbo."

Samantha saw Thorin give the Hobbit a look and say a harsh comment. Her blood boiled but she held her peace, for now.


	9. Chapter 9

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing. By Rude I mean...not offering any suggestions on how to make the story better and just flaming.  
**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

My Reviews: I am very sorry, I have not been on lately, my sister is in Alaska.**  
**

Chapter:

Fili and Kili found a nice dry cave for them to sleep in. The only one who found the way the cave looked suspicious was Veronica. Samantha didn't care anymore. It was dry and it wasn't moving or throwing stones. Excellent place to sleep.

Veronica eyed the cave and then looked at Thorin, "Don't you find it strange that it looks as if this place has been swept clean by something?" Thorin simply looked at her like she was crazy and went to get his bed ready. Veronica muttered, "Apparently not."

Veronica stepped in cautiously, then she looked at her sister, "What do you think?"

Samantha snorted, she was already asleep. Fili held in a laugh and rolled over on his side, his whole body shaking. Kili smirked and tried to cover a smile, "Well, she can fall asleep on command."

Thorin raised his eyes to the ceiling. Of course his sister-son's would choose to make friends with the person he disliked the most. He looked at Balin who looked very amused.

Veronica laid down next to her sister and curled into a fetal position, falling asleep like that. Not long after small snoring sounds came from her. The loudest snorer was Samantha, which amused the younger dwarves to no end.

When Bilbo tried to leave Thorin was listening. Suddenly the floor opened up and everyone fell through. Many of them screamed, Samantha slept for a couple minutes until she hit the ground, then she woke up with her fists flying, accidentally catching an Goblin in the jaw.

Samantha screamed when she saw the creatures, "Creatures from the pit of darkness!" She pulled back her bow and shot one between the eyes, when suddenly they where all herded like cattle away.

Veronica was terrified, she shook again but she kept her chin up. That is, until she couldn't see Bilbo anymore. She looked around and cried out for the hobbit, but he never answered, and she couldn't find him anywhere.

* * *

When they were finally herded into the Goblin Kings chamber area Samantha stared at it then commented rudely, "Well, you certainly are ugly. And you need to loose a few pounds."

The Goblin King wasn't sure what to make of the obnoxious girl, "And you need to loose a few pounds for a human girl."

Samantha gave the Goblin a fanged grin, "You first."

Veronica covered her sister's mouth and wondered if maybe if she was really nice to the Goblin King, maybe he would let them go. But she highly doubted it.

When the Orcs frisked them they threw the blade like it would jump up and attack them. Samantha commented dryly to Fili, "Its not like the blade is going to grow legs and attack them."

Fili found this terribly amusing, he laughed. The Goblin King became offended, "YOU DARE LAUGH AT MY FEAR, DWARF SCUM!"

Samantha tilted her head then smiled, "Actually, I caused his laughter. Because I was laughing at your irrational fear of a blade that does not talk, think, or walk."

The Goblin King had enough and they where all pinned to the ground, obviously Samantha has inadvertently sped up their execution.


	10. Chapter 10

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing. By Rude I mean...not offering any suggestions on how to make the story better and just flaming.  
**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

A bright light and a boom sounded and made all the dwarves and Goblins fall down. Gandalf said in a loud voice, "Arm yourselves!" Samantha didn't need to be told twice, she grabbed the bow and arrows again. Soon they where all running. Samantha hated the fact that they where being chased, she wanted the ugly creatures just to stop. If they would just stop then not so many of them would be killed.

Veronica stayed behind her sister, unknowing that Fili and Kili where keeping her safe. They all fell through the opening and Samantha had crawled out first, remembering this part very well. The Goblin King fell through and on top of the other dwarves. Kili said in despair, "You have got to be kidding me!"

"I am pretty sure, that sense you feel the pain, that no one is kidding you." Samantha said, very giggly at the moment. All the dwarves stared at her then she kissed the ground, "I AHM ALIVE!"

Gandalf chuckled and then they all decided to escape. Not like they had much of a choice, the Goblins would be after them soon enough. They ran down the side of the hill, well, Samantha sort of fell down the hill. Occasionally running headlong into trees. Veronica stayed by Fili and Kili, looking over her shoulder every once in a while, just to make sure that her sister was keeping up.

Thorin made the harsh comments about Bilbo running away and going home. Samantha growled, "Would you stop being so mean about Mr. Bilbo!? He has never done anything to you, I mean, besides exist."

Thorin was about to rip into her with his words when Bilbo popped up, coming out awkwardly. Veronica noticed that he seemed to be putting something in his pocket, of course he was! He got the Ring of Power.

Suddenly they heard a howl and creatures from heck started running towards them. Samantha ran to a tree then stared at her, remembering...She had no clue how to climb a tree. Samantha looked behind herself then saw the creatures, suddenly the motivation overcame her to jump up into the tree. Fili and Kili also helped by pulling her up into the tree. Veronica had wasted no time, she had remembered this part. She had climbed up before anyone else.

When the Pale Orc came Samantha covered Thorin's eyes, "Don't look! He will somehow possess you!" Thorin pushed her hands off of his eyes and gave the Orc the Perfect Look of Death and Shock mixed together.

Samantha covered her eyes and muttered, "Tell me when its over." No one quite knew what she was talking about, but by now they where all used to Samantha's eccentricities.


	11. Chapter 11

The Unexpected Members

By Samhoku

**Disclaimer: I do not own anyone but myself, I have permission to use my sister.**

**Rules for Comments: No rude comments nor swearing. By Rude I mean...not offering any suggestions on how to make the story better and just flaming.  
**

**Rated: T for safety.**

**Comments: I am trying to keep this as realistic as possible.**

Chapter:

Samantha kept her eyes covered and she heard them all yelling at Thorin. She squeaked and kept her eyes closed, "Where is Bilbo?"

Fili and Kili both looked around and a horrified expression crossed their faces as they realized that their little buddy wasn't there. Samantha peaked out through her fingers and saw the little hobbit standing up to the Pale Orc. Samantha covered her eyes again, "He is gonna die."

Veronica yelled at the pale orc with as much ferociousness as she could manage, "Leave the little guy alone!" She knew she wasn't making much of a difference by the way the Pale Orc was ignoring her.

Fili saw the Eagles and pushed Samantha out of the tree and unto ones back. Samantha screamed then clutched to the giant bird, still screaming. Which she ended up doing until she lost her voice.

Veronica had to be dragged out of the tree by the eagle, she did not want to release the tree. They all flew to the rock face and where put down. Thorin started ranting at Bilbo about stupidity and Veronica had enough. Before Samantha could remind her and before he could hug Bilbo, Veronica slugged Thorin in the face.

Thorin stumbled a few feet back and stared at the tiny female in amazement. She could punch harder then he figured, "What was that for, Lass?!"

Veronica put her fists on her hips and her head started swaying as she shook a finger at him and scolded him, "After all that hobbit has done for you! You are an ungrateful dwarf! After all the pain you caused him you should at least be giving him some thanks! Bilbo could have left you to get eaten and beheaded, but he didn't!"

Thorin blinked and his eyes followed her finger, trying to figure out how to fix what he just did. Thorin decided to take the easy route. He brushed Veronica aside and hugged the little hobbit.

Veronica stood there and her face turned red. She spun and was about to kick Thorin in the rear when she realized what he was doing. She smiled then looked at Samantha. Her eyes narrowed and she stomped towards her sister, "Why didn't you remind me!"

Samantha backed up, noticing the upcoming storm of violence. Sure, Samantha could out punch her sister, but when her sister was in a rage their was no stopping her. The best action would be to flee.

Gandalf was talking very seriously along with the Dwarf King and the Hobbit. In the background the two sisters where chasing one another, unaware that they would have to face the Desolation of Smaug.


End file.
